a Barbie I can relate to! At long last, here are some NEW Barbie dolls to coincide
with her and OUR aging gracefully. These are a bit more realistic ...
Barbie. Comes with her own set of blended-lens fashion frames in six wild colors
(half-frames too!), neck chain and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart
Flash Barbie. Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while
tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. Comes with hand-held fan and
Hair Barbie. As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her whiskers grow. Available
with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror.
Arms Barbie. Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new, roomier-sleeved gowns.
Good news on the tummy front, too-muumuus with tummy-support panels are included.
Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's
dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then
slip on soft terry mules.
Barbie. Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle,
from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics.
Mom Barbie. All that experience as a cheer-leader is really paying off as Barbie
dusts off old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr. Comes with minivan
in robin-egg blue or white, and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.
Crisis Barbie. It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo (her
personal trainer) is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac. They're
hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&B.
Includes a real tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do."
Barbie. Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house, Ken's car, and Ken's boat.
Barbie. Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl.
Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps. Clean and sober, she's going
to meetings religiously. Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a six-pack
of Diet Coke.
Barbie. This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things,
and cries a lot. She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the
tube, clicking through the channels. Comes with Depends and Kleenex.
a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self"