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humorous thoughts

Sayings …

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

Duct tape is like the force, it has a light side and a dark side and it holds the universe together

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your mouth is moving

Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.

Don't be irreplaceable; if you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

Never mess up an apology with an excuse.

 

 

So you thought you knew everything?

Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Two-thirds of the world's eggplant is grown in New Jersey.

The longest one-syllable word in the English language is "screeched."

On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag.

All of the clocks in the movie "Pulp Fiction" are stuck on 4:20.

Continued tomorrow

 

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